When’s Your Kid’s Birthday? by the Mama Bird Diaries

April is Birthday Month at NYMetroParents. We ask our guest bloggers to share their funny, poignant, or memorable birthday stories, or provide helpful tips on planning a birthday party. One of our favorite mom bloggers of The Mama Bird Diaries shares how it’s OK to not recall your children’s exact birthdays—hey, she knows the exact birth weights of each of her four kids!

And thankfully, no one tweeted back, “you are a complete moron” because if they had, I would have felt obligated to dust off my master’s degree to prove that I’m not. Or at least, 15 years ago, I wasn’t. Oh my god. 15 years ago.

Anyway, I knew Chase and Harlowe were either born May 18th or May 21st.

I made a mental note to look it up because that’s the sort of thing one should know off the top of their head. Right?

Except I never got around to finding out and then yesterday, I’m sitting in a kids gym class innocently chatting with one of the moms and she says, “So when were your twins born?”

Now, of course, I should have just picked one of the dates. I mean, was this woman going to come to my house and demand to see the birth certificate? But instead, I stuttered and said:

“Umm… It’s totally either May 18th or May 21st. But luckily, I’ve got a couple months to pin it down before their second birthday!”

And she looked at me as if I was…what’s that word?… oh right, INSANE. And then she tried to make me feel better by saying that sometimes she gets confused trying to remember the birth weights of her children, which is completely not the same thing but I appreciated her efforts.

I immediately gave myself a pop quiz and was actually able to recall the birth weights of every single kid (not in the world, just the ones I gave birth to)…

Chase: 5 pounds, 8 ounces

Harlowe: 3 pounds, 10 ounces

Summer: 8 pounds, 5 ounces

Dylan: 7 pounds, 3 ounces.

(I figured you would want me to prove it.)

And also, because I’m a super committed mom, I finally looked up the twins’ birthday and it’s May 21st.

Sadly, I was leaning with the 18th.

Kelcey Kintner blogs at The Mama Bird Diaries and is the co-founder of The Mouthy Housewives, a humor advice site. Follow her on @themamabirddiaries.
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